Go West To Meet Young Men

That is the best way to describe traveling with Tess.

As I sit here thousands of feet up in the air I look out my window and see only clouds. It is quite late for us if we were still on east coast time but traveling west the sun is also traveling with us.

Another name for the post could have been planes, trains and automobiles.

This has been quite a long and eventful day of traveling for me. It started upon waking when my husband left for work. There was no good bye from him. No wishing me a good trip or safe travels. As a matter of fact there wasn’t one word from my husband to me. Such is my life these days.

I had one last thing to do before I left home to meet up with Tess. Pack. I seemed to leave that task for last. I knew it would be easy. Low cut tops, short skirts, heels, bathing suit and several pairs of flip flops just to aggravate the princess. Because what fun would it be if I didn’t. Last but not least my new sex toys.

My last vacation was with Eddie and seeing that he was my sex toy I didn’t need to worry about packing any. Plus back then I still had my sex toy virginity.

I took the train into the city to meet up with Tess and we hopped in a cab to the airport. We made sure to leave extra time in case of traffic because I know of someone who missed not one but two flights out of this same airport. Diva is in too good of a mood right now to revisit that nightmare.

Seeing that I would be traveling with a princess and I myself queen of the blogettes there was no other option than for us to fly first class. The BBP is very high maintenance in case no one has noticed it yet. With first class came several perks. The first was a special check in area. No waiting in line with the masses for us. We zipped through check in and security in record time.

It was as we entered the security line I stopped to turn around and ask Tess if she happened to have anything steel in her ass. Another first for me. I can’t recall ever asking anyone what was in there ass let alone in the middle of a major airport.

When we checked in we were given directions to the Crown Room lounge. This was the lounge for first class passengers. We checked in there, grabbed a table and headed to the bar for a drink. If you would like to know more about our afternoon here you can read about it in this post Tess wrote while we were still there.

It was a great way to pass the afternoon as we were a few hours early for our flight. Unlike some people who will remain nameless that miss a flight by mere minutes.

We were able to email, blog and twitter. One of my twitters said the following,

The height of insanity. Twittering to the person sitting across from you.

Most of the time Tess and I are on the other side of a laptop when we chat and twitter with each other. On this day we were on the opposite side of the table as we did it. It still brought the same laughter to me.

As the free drinks flowed, Tess came back from the bar with a Maker’s Mark. Can someone explain to me how I seem to only hang around with people who drink this? I had my first taste of this when Tess shared her drink with me unlike someone else we know who never does. Somehow I bought all those bottles of bourbon way back when and never tried it.

We boarded our flight and waited to push back from the gate. We waited and waited and waited. Don’t worry the wait wasn’t a problem for us. In first class as soon as you sit down they start serving you drinks. I of course ordered a martini while Tess ordered a margarita.

By the time our flight took off we were feeling very happy. Next came the hot moist towel in preparation for dinner. I won’t go into the details of our meal here because food blogging is Tess’s speciality. Plus she has the pictures.

After coffee and desert it was time for a nap. We knew we would be going out upon our arrival and needed to both rest up and sober up. We both reclined our extra rooming comfy seats and I covered myself with a blanket because my skirt was so short.

I woke to find Tess up by the cockpit door chatting with the flight attendant. She did that a lot throughout our flight and I’m not sure if she was attracted to her or was trying to get into the cockpit to see the pilots.

Tess being Tess returned to her seat with a bottle of wine. I’m not sure what when on up there but for some reason it doesn’t shock me at all the Tess could acquire a full unopened bottle of wine at 35,000 feet.

Did I mention the spreadsheet Tess has of the replies from her Craigslist ad? Yeah she does. All of our travel information put into a binder. Tess can make me look disorganized. This is a true vacation for me that I don’t have to do anything or worry about anything. I have Tess.

As we make our descent into San Diego I am now wide awake and sober as a result of my two cups of coffee and nap. Within the hour we will be meeting our west coast blogger friend who was kind enough to offer Thelma and Louise the hospitality of her home.